YMJA Extends Age Limit to 45

YMJA

Skokie, IL – It was decided this week that The Young Messianic Jewish Alliance would be extending its age limit from 30 to 45. The decision came after a record number of aged-out Millennials and Gen X-ers tried to sneak onto the bus to the water park during the YMJA field trip from Messiah Conference this past July.

“We already have an unprecedented amount of 30 and 40 somethings hanging around The YMJA,” stated YMJA Treasurer, Ravi Goldberg. “They don’t care that they’ve aged out and they just won’t leave. We’ve tried everything; spraying them with water bottles, serving restraining orders, and even locking them all in a closet. Nothing is working. At least if we officially change the age limit to 45 they will be forced to pay the membership fee and those YMJA T-shirts they’ve been stealing all these years will be rightfully theirs. Plus, then we’ll be able to use the extra money to buy more potato chips for everyone!”

Executive Director, Rabbi Kevin Solomon, added, “Starting in 2017 The YMJA will service ages 13-45 and the YMJA part of Messiah Conference will have the following tracks: ‘Teen,’ ‘Young Adult,’ and ‘You’re really too old to be here, but we didn’t have a choice.’”

More information about the YMJA and their upcoming conferences can be found at ymja.org

5 thoughts on “YMJA Extends Age Limit to 45

  1. Pingback: Meme | The Messianic Meow

  2. Pingback: YMJA Leadership Team Weekend Meetings Result in Decision to Buy Out Snapchat IPO |

  3. Pingback: YMJA Finally Kicked Out of YMJA For Being Too Old |

  4. Pingback: UMJC 20s Committee Pleased to Announce Zero Attendees Attacked by Wild Animals During 2017 Kabbetz Conference |

  5. Pingback: YMJA President Threatens Messianic Meow with IAMCS Investigation for Mocking Him | messianiccomedy.com

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s